When to use “I” versus “Me”

Posted on March 5, 2012 by NoelleInAZ

Confession: I watch “The Bachelor.” The premise fascinates me: Twenty-five women vie for the affections of one man, as if he were their last chances to find happily ever after. Every season, they say the same things about “feeling a strong connection” with the bachelor, that they’re doing this to fall in love and get married (even though the show has a 90 percent failure rate) and that the other “girls” aren’t there for the right reasons. Every season, the dismissed women bawl to the camera that they can’t believe they were let go, which makes me wonder if they are aware that the other 24 women are dating the same guy.

And, every season, the bachelor–or one of the women in his harem–says something like this: “I’m excited to see where Courtney and I’s relationship goes.”

:::Shivers:::

Somewhere along our development, saying “So-and-so and I” was drilled so deeply in our minds that we think, no matter what the sentence structure, it is always right to say: “So-and-so and I.”

Here is the rule: If you and your friend are the subject of the sentence, then it is So-and-so and I. If you and your friend are adjectives (showing possession) or direct objects, then it is So-and-so and me. When you are in doubt, do a little exercise in your head. Make two sentences out of one.

Observe:

Courtney swam in the ocean.
I swam in the ocean.
Therefore: Courtney and I swam in the ocean.
Why: Because Courtney and “I” are the subjects of the sentence. “Courtney and me” swam in the ocean is grammatically incorrect. Confession #2: Before age 18, I always said “So-and-so and me.” Confession #3: I knew better, but I said it because all my friends spoke that way.

I want to take Ben’s relationship to the next level.
I want to take my relationship to the next level.
Therefore: I want to take Ben’s and my relationship to the next level.
Why: Because Ben and “I” are adjectives (describing ownership of the relationship). Would you say “I want to take I’s relationship to the next level”? No. That would sound stupid.

Ben gave a rose to Courtney.
Ben gave a rose to me.
Therefore: Ben gave a rose to Courtney and me.
Why: Because Courtney and “I” are the recipients of roses, or direct objects of the subject and verb. Would you say “Ben gave a rose to I”? Again. Stupid.

Now back to our regular programming.

Let’s talk about sex

Posted on January 10, 2012 by NoelleInAZ

Source: goodhusbanding.com

Over the holidays, while shopping in Jerome, AZ, I picked up a little book called “100 Words Almost Everyone Confuses and Misuses.” The book is almost pocket-size, only 120 pages, and cost a mere six bucks. I tend to believe that people who need the book don’t buy it, and people like me, who could write the book, are its best customers.

Although I’m confident in my grammatical abilities, I realize I don’t know everything. (Please don’t tell my husband or son that I admitted to that.) The book taught me a few things, including the difference between gender and sex.

Gender/sex: This one has always confused me. In a survey, is it proper to ask respondents’ gender or sex? I used to believe that gender referred to the state of being male and female, and that “sex” on a survey question should require a yes/no response. “100 Words” has the best explanation I have read: gender refers to masculine, feminine and neuter while sex refers to male or female. “Sex is who we are; gender is what we do,” the adage goes.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, we all know that sex as an act is something we do, ha, ha, ha …

Gender refers to sexual identity; sex refers to the classification of males and females. The book does allow for a gray area and acknowledges that the words are often used interchangeably.

I don’t like gray areas when it comes to grammar. Or sex.

Tips for eliminating wordiness

Posted on December 20, 2011 by NoelleInAZ

I had a teacher in high school who gave me a piece of advice about writing that has stuck with me: When you write, pretend every word costs you a dime.

Wordiness can kill what would otherwise be a great manuscript.

In today’s era of short-attention-span reading, eliminating wordiness is even more important. Get to the point quickly and succinctly without losing meaning and, especially, without losing your “voice.”

Here are a few tips on eliminating wordiness from your writing:

Write your first draft without editing yourself. Let the words flow. Then go back and trim the fat. Trim again.
Look for unnecessary phrases such as: in order to, at the present time, whether or not. Follow this rule: If you can remove a phrase from a sentence without losing meaning, then it is expendable. Doesn’t In order to beat the fastest time… mean the same thing as To beat the fastest time…? If you use a present-tense verb, the phrase at the present time is unnecessary. Doesn’t whether mean the same thing as whether or not?
Using qualifiers such as In my opinion and We believe weaken your statements and add unnecessary words. Which sounds more convincing? I believe I am the best candidate for the position. Or: I am the best candidate for the position.
Use these words only when absolutely necessary: absolutely, virtually, currently, actually and really. Intensifiers such as really, very, quite, extremely and severely rarely do what they are intended, and add an element of hysteria or exaggeration. Yes, I used absolutely on purpose
Use the word different only when you need to illustrate that something is different. For example, We visited four different islands is the same as saying, We visited four islands, isn’t it? Could you visit four same islands? The only time to use different is to illustrate that one thing is different from another, as in That island’s liquor law is different from the law of its neighboring island.
I keep a list of overused words near my desk. When I edit a manuscript, I search these words and delete them. Also is one of those words. The word is often used with and, which makes also unnecessary; doesn’t and indicate also?
Rewrite statements that start with It is and There are, which are known as expletive constructions. A grammar page at Capital Community College states it best: It “robs a sentence of energy before it gets a chance to do its work.”

Example: There are 200 people waiting outside to buy tickets to see Lady Ga-Ga. Yawn…
Better: Two-hundred people are waiting outside to buy tickets to see Lady Ga-Ga. Wow!

Hire a proofreader/editor to polish your text. (Shameless self-promotion.) Everyone knows someone who is a natural at grammar, spelling and writing. Let them edit important papers before publishing them.

Affect/effect and a rant about education

Posted on December 16, 2011 by NoelleInAZ

Recently, I helped my son prepare for his biology mid-term exam. His teacher provided a study guide with questions, which, much to my dismay, was replete with spelling, punctuation and grammatical errors.

Here is an example:

How does the growth rate and death rate effect the growth of a population?

First, let’s talk about this affect/effect business. In most cases, affect is a verb and effect is a noun. There are exceptions, but we rarely use them*. To help myself remember which word to use, I recite this sentence: “Special effects affect me,” and I overemphasize the “E” and the “A.” Effects is a noun and the subject of the sentence; affect is the verb because it causes action.

Now that we have the correct verb, let’s attack the subject-verb agreement. The sentence has two subjects: growth rate and death rate. It is a compound subject. It is plural. If I were writing this sentence and were not sure if I should use do or does, first I would make the question a statement, so I can get the verb phrase together:

The growth rate and death rate does affect the growth of a population how.

Already that doesn’t sound right, but I’m going to test it to be sure. I’ll replace “growth rate and death rate” with a plural pronoun,”they”:

They does affect the growth of a population how.

Does is totally the wrong choice. Therefore, the question should read:

How do the growth rate and death rate affect the growth of a population?

I understand that these errors are easy to make and, really, I am just as annoyed by homonyms as the next guy. But I hold higher standards for educators. I expect them to know the difference between affect/effect and understand subject-verb agreement. Language arts is an inherent part of every discipline, and if it’s not your strength, find tools that help you and have them ready at your fingertips.

**Affect* as a noun means an emotion or feeling, as in “season affect disorder.” The pronunciation is different from the verb “affect” because the emphasis is placed on the second syllable. Effect as a verb is used to describe bringing about an effect, as in “I’m going to effect a change right now; you will no longer misuse the comma.” These two examples are rare uses of these words, so if affect/effect confuse you, I recommend using my “Special effects affect me” tool and totally disregarding this paragraph.

5 Tips for Persuasive Writing

Posted on December 1, 2011 by NoelleInAZ

I have done a little academic editing on the side ever since grad school. It’s not the most exciting work and, no offense to my academic friends and colleagues, the writing is a little dry. There are times when I have to step away from the computer, lay down on my office floor and take a 20-minute snooze. I’m not kidding. But that’s the nature of the writing. It’s scientific, factual and not meant to be titillating.

I recently edited a paper for an assistant professor in Michigan. She was resubmitting her paper to a journal, so I read it and the defense letter that accompanied it. I returned the papers to her with tips for writing solid defense papers. These five tips can be applied in other persuasive communications as well:

Avoid negative phrases and words. Use words that have positive connotations. Rather than saying, “We agree that our explanation of XYZ was weak,” say something like, “We are happy to provide a more detailed explanation of XYZ.” Another example, “I might not meet all the requirements you spelled out in your job description, but I can learn,” could be more positively stated this way: “I am skilled at X and experienced in Y, and I quickly adapt to new technologies and processes.” A word of caution: Never misrepresent yourself by rephrasing negative statements in the positive. You cannot spin something like “I spent 18 months in a federal prison for tax evasion” into “My background includes extensive knowledge of tax laws and penalties.”
Be confident. My client used phrases such as “we believe…,” “… did our best to explain…” and “we feel.” No one cares what you believe or feel. Well, your mom does, but editors and potential employers do not care. They want facts. Rather than writing: “I believe I would be a great addition to your company,” write this: “I will be a great addition to your company because…,” and then explain why. Remember “Show & Tell“?
Get to the point. Read and re-read your copy before you send it. Avoid flowery language and overuse of adjectives and adverbs. Read it aloud. Eliminate wordiness.
Provide evidence. Direct your audience to sources that back up your argument. Back up your statements with facts. May I refer you again to “Show & Tell“?
Photo from Fotolia

Shut up. Once you have made your point about an issue and illustrated it with facts, let it go and move on to the next topic. I use this one often with my son. “I get it,” I say to him, which is better than telling him to shut up. “You don’t have to keep up the argument. I’m saying yes. Stop selling!”

Add your tips for writing persuasive arguments in the comment section below.

Overuse of the prefix “pre”

Posted on November 21, 2011 by NoelleInAZ

My husband asked me, “Isn’t pre-approved a word?” as he spell-checked an e-mail.

He hit on one of my pet peeves. Not only is it not a word, it’s also unnecessary.

When did the word “approved” become inadequate? If you are pre-approved to do a job, doesn’t that mean you are approved? In a literal sense, doesn’t pre-approved mean that you are approved before you are approved? Here are more offenders:

Pre-board
Pre-heat
Pre-register
Pre-approve
Pre-order
Pre-existing
And, my favorite: pre-recorded

George Carlin has a rant about this topic (parental warning: He drops an F-bomb in the video). When we pre-board a flight, aren’t we boarding it? It really means “advance boarding,” but that has more syllables.

You might argue that the prefix adds meaning to the word, as in: board before the masses, heat before cooking, register before attending, approved before applying, etc., etc.

I could go on … and I think I will …

When shopping for a home, buyers will have an advantage if they are pre-approved for a mortgage. When did it become not enough to be approved?

If you pre-order an item, does this mean you are ordering it before it is available? Would it not be more accurate to say, “advance order”?

Pre-registration really gets my knickers in a knot. To attend a workshop, one must pre-register. What if I don’t want to pre-register? What if I want to register? Will they turn me away?

The morning announcer on my local NPR station says, “You’re listening to a pre-recorded hour of the Diane Rehm Show.” If something is recorded, it’s not live. Even its predecessor, “previously recorded” was redundant.

Sigh …

If the prefix "pre" doesn't change the meaning of a word, it isn't necessary.

My philosophy is, if you get rid of it and you don’t lose meaning, then it’s not necessary. It’s fat. Lose it.

Show & Tell

Posted on November 14, 2011 by NoelleInAZ

The Difference Between Showing and Telling

I had a journalism instructor at Ball State who harped on us students to “show, don’t tell” in our stories. “You can’t say something’s important without showing why it’s important,” he’d say.

You build a better case for your argument if you illustrate your point. You tell a better story if you paint a vivid picture. Don’t just tell that a corporation’s bankruptcy had a huge impact on a community. Show how many people were economically and emotionally impacted by the company’s failure.

I use this type of communication with my Little Sister, with whom I have been matched through Big Brothers Big Sisters for about four years. My Little should be in ninth grade this year, but she has yet to finish seventh grade for various reasons, the primary of which is that her mother allows it to happen.

Telling:
If you graduate from high school, you will get a better job and make more money than if you drop out of school.

Showing:
The National Dropout Prevention Center at Clemson University gives five reasons why students should stay in school.

High school dropouts are four times as likely to be unemployed.
Graduating from high school will determine how well you live for the next 50 years. High school graduates earn almost $7,500 more per year than high school dropouts.
Dropouts are more likely to apply for and receive public assistance.
Eighty-two percent of prisoners in America are high school dropouts.
Alternative programs for students who are not successful in the usual school setting are available.

Showing includes facts. Telling can be vague or ambiguous.

Here is another example:

Telling:
You’re pretty.

Showing:
You have beautiful eyes, skin and hair. Your smile lights up a room.

I’ll take either of these statements as factual, but the showing version has a greater impact on me. I’m more likely to check those facts in my rear-view mirror, and on a good day, I might agree.

In promoting your business, you might tell me, “My company offers the best rates around.” Well, that’s fine, but I don’t know what that means. Show me what that means by saying, “My company’s rates are 5 percent lower than our closest competitor and an average of 10 percent lower than all major players in our industry.”

This should pique your interest

Posted on November 10, 2011 by NoelleInAZ

Homonyms drive me crazy not so much because people confuse them, but because so many of them exist for what seem like unnecessary reason other than to torture those of us who care about words.

Do we really need compliment (an expression of praise) and complement (something that completes another)?

Ambiance and ambience? According to Grammarist.com, ambiance is the original French word and ambience is the preferred English version. My, my. Those bad ass Englishmen really showed those French what they think of their language by changing the fifth letter of THAT word.

I can forgive writers for misusing homonyms that are so closely related in meaning and spelling that they require a trip to dictionary.com. I get lazy, too, and often just guess.

Peek, peak and pique are often misused and aside from sounding the same, they share little else in common.

Peek, as you know, refers to the act of furtively looking at something, as in, “My sister and I were notorious for peeking at our Christmas presents and spoiling my mother’s surprises.” (True anecdote, by the way.)

Peak refers to reaching a highest achievement, as in “Some people peak in popularity in high school and go downhill from there.” (I don’t know anyone like this.) The word also refers to the tippy tops of mountains.

Pique is the most misused of the three siblings. It is often used in conjunction withor “curiosity,” and it means to arouse interest. “A well-written headline will pique readers’ interests.”

Beautifully wrapped presents pique our interest during the peak of the Christmas season, and we cannot help but pull away the tape and peek inside the boxes.

What is your homonym pet peeve? Post it in comments below.

Breaking the habit: Double spaces between sentences

Posted on November 3, 2011 by NoelleInAZ

For those of us who edit copy and design media, double spaces between sentences jump off the page. Not only is double-spaced copy aesthetically unappealing, it is also and indicator of the age of the person who created it! Think about it: Our typing teachers in the 1970s and 1980s taught us to hit the space bar twice between sentences. Back then, typewriters used spacing conventions where each character used an equal amount of space, so double spaces were necessary to aid readers.

With advancements in technology and the proliferation of computers, the need for double spacing between words became irrelevant. Thanks to proportional fonts, each character—including punctuation—is allocated its own horizontal space. Words are easier to read, and double spaces between sentences are obsolete.

One of the first things I do when I receive copy to edit is a find/replace to look for double spaces and replace with single spaces.

To illustrate, check out these examples. The first paragraph has double spaces. The second paragraph is cleaned up with single spaces between the sentences.

Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Maecenas at volutpat metus. Aliquam pretium nisi ut nunc tincidunt porttitor. Donec vehicula, enim vitae elementum mattis, elit justo accumsan lacus, viverra tincidunt justo dui quis tellus. Pellentesque habitant morbi tristique senectus et netus et malesuada fames ac turpis egestas. Nam ac pretium purus. Cum sociis natoque penatibus et magnis dis parturient montes, nascetur ridiculus mus. Ut ornare purus vel urna laoreet eget vestibulum augue gravida. Proin eget augue mauris, et dictum dolor. In hac habitasse platea dictumst. Suspendisse facilisis metus a leo sagittis iaculis. Ut dapibus ornare arcu, a auctor erat vehicula eget.

Double spacing is a hard habit to break, but you can do it! If you stopped hitting the “carriage return” when word processors and computers automatically wrapped you to the next line, you can stop double tapping the space bar.

The Oxford comma

Posted on October 25, 2011 by NoelleInAZ

Ah, the great mysterious comma … when to use, when to omit …

Without memorizing any complicated punctuation rules, one simple test is to read a sentence aloud. If you pause during the sentence you probably need a comma there (unless you have gas, which is totally understandable). When in doubt, leave it out.

In the case of separating items in a series, as in “The keys to living a full life are experiencing true love, having a great job, enjoying good health and watching ‘Storage Wars,’,” placing a comma after “health” and before “and” is a subject of debate.

In academic and literary writing, the comma — known as the Oxford comma — is employed to separate items in a series. In journalistic writing, which tends to be frugal with its punctuation and word usage, the comma is omitted. Those of us who have edited copy to fit a tight space know what a curse it can be to have one character too many.

To use the Oxford comma or not is a question of your company’s style or your personal preference; however, be consistent throughout your writing.

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